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"I'm sorry you lost your baby, Dove."
"My baby? Not ours?" I can't believe what I'm hearing. He doesn't even seem a little bit upset!
"Maybe this is for the best; you know I wasn't ready to be a father anyway."
I'm so uncomfortable that he's having this conversation in front of Jenny—it feels like he's purposefully trying to embarrass me. I glance slightly towards Jenny to ask her to leave but notice her trying to hide the grin on her face.
Just as I'm about to ask Jenny about the grin, Kelly beats me to it. I didn't even realize she saw it, but I'm grateful she did. Kelly walks slowly towards Jenny, clearly ready to call her out.
"What's so funny? You think this is a joke?"
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I'm so lost in my thoughts that I barely register the soft squeak of my hospital door opening. I don't need to look up to know it's Kelly; the familiar scent of her light vanilla perfume gives her away.
Before I can turn around, she's already climbing into my hospital bed, wrapping her arms around me from behind in a tight hug. I didn't realize how much I needed her until this moment. I don't have to be strong on my own anymore, and I finally allow myself to grieve, letting the tears I've been holding back flow freely.
As my sobs shake my body, she just holds me tighter, not saying a word or trying to hush me. It's exactly what I need—just the space to feel everything. Even the ache in my chest feels a little lighter with her here.
It feels like I've been crying for hours, but it's really only been about twenty minutes. When I finally manage to take a deep breath and regain some control, I hear Kelly's soft sniffles and realize she's been crying too. I reach for her hand, gently lace my fingers with hers, and give it a squeeze, offering her some comfort in return.
After lying here for a while, sniffling and holding each other, Kelly finally gets up and sits in the chair next to my bed. She takes my hand again, her eyes full of concern and sadness, waiting patiently for me to open up.
So, I do. I tell her everything—the unbearable pain that hit me at home, the terror I felt when I saw the blood running down my legs, how I tried calling Daniel and Jenny, but neither of them answered, and how I eventually had to call an ambulance on my own. The words spill out in a broken stream, and I feel her hand tighten around mine as I speak.
I tell her about Dr. Smith and Nurse Jackie doing everything they could, but in the end, they couldn't save the pregnancy.
As I speak, I see a range of emotions play across Kelly's face—sadness, empathy, love, and then, unmistakably, anger. She's never liked Jenny, always saying she gives off weird vibes, and honestly, I agree. I have talked to Daniel about it so many times, but he's made it clear that Jenny is one of his closest friends and he won't let her go. Part of me understands, because that's exactly how I feel about Kelly.
Kelly climbs back into the bed with me, wrapping her arms around me again. She doesn't let go, and I'm grateful for the warmth of her embrace.
After a while, she speaks softly. "I'm so sorry, Ari. I'm sorry you had to go through this alone since yesterday. Why didn't you call me? You know I would've dropped everything to be here with you."
I let out a sigh, knowing I owe her an explanation. "I know, Kells, but... I guess I just wanted to pretend a little longer that this was all just a bad dream. When I finally worked up the courage to call you, it felt like I was admitting that it was real, you know?"
She hums but doesn't press further. "Okay, hun, I get it. Now I'm starving, and I'm ordering us some food."
We spend a couple of hours cuddling and watching TV. Nurse Jackie pops in every now and then, probably just checking in on how I'm holding up. Eventually, we convince her to join us for lunch, which turns out to be really nice.
Nurse Jackie tells me I have to stay another night for more blood tests because Dr. Smith found something in my bloodstream that's worrying her. Kelly quickly offers to run out and grab me an overnight bag. "You definitely need a nice hot shower," she says, and I can't help but agree.
Just as Kelly is about to hand me a glass of ice water, Daniel casually walks into the room with his "bestie," Jenny. I'm surprised to see her here.
I'm not sure if I should say anything or just let it go. I don't understand why she needs to be here. After our argument, she didn't even attempt to apologize for the things she said and just pretended nothing happened.
This woman clearly doesn't like me—anyone can see it in her eyes—so her being in my hospital room right now makes my skin crawl.
Daniel silently plops himself into the chair next to me, not bothering with a hello. Leaning in, he takes hold of my hand and gives it a small squeeze. "I'm sorry you lost your baby, Dove."
"My baby? Not ours?" I can't believe what I'm hearing. He doesn't even seem a little bit upset!
"Maybe this is for the best; you know I wasn't ready to be a father anyway."
I'm so uncomfortable that he's having this conversation in front of Jenny—it feels like he's purposefully trying to embarrass me. I glance slightly towards Jenny to ask her to leave but notice her trying to hide the grin on her face.
Just as I'm about to ask Jenny about the grin, Kelly beats me to it. I didn't even realize she saw it, but I'm grateful she did. Kelly walks slowly towards Jenny, clearly ready to call her out.
"What's so funny? You think this is a joke?"
Jenny turns to Daniel with this exaggerated look of shock, like she's the victim here. And, of course, the idiot falls for it.
He drops my hand and steps between them, like he's trying to protect her from some kind of threat.
"I'm sure you saw wrong, Kelly," Daniel says, trying to smooth things over.
I jump in, my voice unsteady with anger. "No, I saw that smirk too. Why is she even here, Dani? This isn't a conversation she should be part of."
I know he's going to ignore me—he's been doing that a lot lately. It's always the same old nonsense, and honestly, I'm reaching my breaking point.
"Oh, come on, Aria, be realistic," he says, exasperated. "She's my friend, and I was going to tell her about this anyway. You talk to Kelly about stuff at home too, so it's only fair I get to do the same."
Then he turns around and takes Jenny's hand. "Let's go, Jen. We don't need this."
And just like that, he walks out with her. I try to hold it in, but a harsh sob escapes my lips, raw and painful. I don't want to cry in front of them, but I can't help it.
I can't help but wonder why he keeps choosing her over me. This should be a time for us to lean on each other, to be strong together, but it's like the miscarriage doesn't even faze him.
When did I lose the supportive boyfriend, the boy I grew up with? When did he turn into this stranger?
I look at Kelly, and I can see the anger simmering in her eyes. I know she wants to go after Daniel and Jenny, to give them a piece of her mind. But instead, she stays by my side, offering the support I so desperately need right now.
I couldn't wait to get home and climb into my own bed. The nurses and doctors are amazing, but there's nothing like being in your own space. I unlock the door and walk inside, hoping Daniel is home, but it's completely silent, so obviously he isn't here.
I take off my jacket, hang it on the coat rack by the door, and stretch my stiff muscles. I glance towards the kitchen and let out a puff of air because I know what's waiting for me there. I was in the kitchen when the cramps hit me out of nowhere, and the amount of bleeding and how quickly it happened was overwhelming.
As expected, the mess is still there, including my footprints from when I walked over to the counter to get my cell to call for help.
I put my medication on the counter and get the bucket and rag out to clean up a bit. Just as I'm about to fill the bucket with water, Kelly walks into the kitchen from the laundry room.
"Okay, Ri, I put the clothes in the washing machine. Do you want me to hang them outside or put them in the dryer when they are done?" she asks absentmindedly.
"I'll hang them outside, don't worry. Thanks, Kells."
Opening the tap at the sink to fill the bucket with hot water, Kelly walks over and hip-bumps me out of the way. "Move, I'll handle this. You go get in the shower."
"No, it's really okay. I just need to clean the blood off the floor first and then I will go take a shower," I say, pointing to the floor.
She shakes her head. "Nah uh. All you need to do is take that shower and get to bed. Nurse Jacky gave me strict instructions to make sure you get enough sleep and finish your meds. I plan on following her orders to the T."
"Thank you, Kells, but it's blood. I can't ask you to clean that."
"Good thing you didn't ask, right? I know where the gloves are, and I know where you keep your bleach and everything I will need. Now, please go before I call Jacky on you."
Chuckling at her threat because I know she will really do it, I give her a tight hug and turn to walk to my bedroom.
Lowering myself to the shower floor, I let the tears come, feeling every bit of the hurt. My chest is so tight, it feels like it's being squeezed. It's hard to breathe, like I'm trying to get air in my lungs but it's just not happening.
I sob and allow myself the time to grieve for my baby. My throat is raw by the time I start to calm down. Pulling myself back together, I give my body a final rinse and switch off the water.
It's like Kelly was waiting for me just outside the door because as I step out of the shower she walks in, wraps me in a warm towel, and hugs me from behind. She got me everything I needed, including a pad, and I'm so happy she is here with me right now.
Once I'm dressed, she quickly blow-dries my hair and puts me in bed. She makes sure I'm comfy, turning on the electric blanket and tucking me in tightly.
I must have slept for a few hours because when I open my eyes, I notice the room is dark. About ten minutes later, Kelly walks in. She has a bag full of food from my favourite Chinese place. She puts on the light and gets into bed next to me.
As we relax in bed, my head laying on her lap, we hear the front door open and then close.
I lift my head and move over to sit beside Kelly. When Daniel walks in, he looks genuinely surprised to see us here. His eyes flick between us, and he awkwardly waves. Kelly stands up, and for a moment, I feel panicked. But she gives me a soft smile, whispering she's just giving us a chance to talk. As she walks past Daniel, she gives him the meanest side-eye imaginable.
I thought Daniel would come sit and talk to me about our baby and what happened, but instead, he walks right past me and goes to the bathroom. I can hear him digging through the vanity, moving things around, and opening and closing drawers.
What is he doing? Is he avoiding me?
"Did you clean up the mess you made in the kitchen? I'm not touching that blood. It's disgusting," he yells from the bathroom.
What is wrong with this man?
"Are you joking right now, Daniel?" I snap back. "I can't believe you just said that. I lost our baby, and all you care about is the mess—the mess you obviously saw and left anyway."
"Look, I didn't ask for this, alright?" Daniel answers. "It's not like I wanted the child to die. I can't deal with this right now. Just clean it up, okay?"
"Doesn't any of this bother you?" I demand. "Don't you care about me, even a little, Dani? I went through the miscarriage alone. You didn't even bother answering a simple phone call."
He lets out a frustrated sigh and walks back into the room. "Okay, I get it, I messed up, and I'm sorry," he says, waving his hands around in frustration. "I don't know how to handle any of this!"
We both stay quiet because I know I can't be too harsh on him; we all deal with pain differently, and I need to let him grieve in his own way.
He walks further into the room and grabs a duffel bag. I follow his movements with my eyes. Turning to me, he says, "Aria, let's face it: the baby wasn't healthy enough to make it. You weren't that far along anyway. Jenny said it wasn't even considered a baby yet, so you really shouldn't feel this sad about it."
I feel like I can't breathe.
"So, I'm not allowed to feel anything because of what Jenny said? She doesn't even have a say in this," I say, my voice shaky and barely audible. Tears sting my eyes because all I want from Dani right now is understanding, a hug, or maybe just a glimpse of my childhood best friend, but I don't know this person anymore.
Daniel's jaw tightens, and he runs his fingers through his hair—a habit of his when he's frustrated. When he finally looks at me, his eyes seem hazy, like he's lost in his own world.
"Look, I didn't ask for this mess," he snaps. "It's not like I wanted the baby to die, but you need to face reality. You lost a fetus, not a child! You are making this harder than it needs to be."
He doesn't wait for a reply and starts packing a few things into the bag. I watch him closely, tears slowly running down my face as he does.
When he's finally done, he looks at me, "Dove, I'm going to leave for the night to clear my head. Maybe ask Kelly to stay over or something." With that, he walks out of the room.
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