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Lett011

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&quot;Having fun?&quot; A voice calls out behind me, soft yet filled with authority as I already know who it is. &quot;Where&#039;s your date?&quot;<br /> &quot;Didn&#039;t bring one,&quot; I reply, looking over my shoulder to see my pack&#039;s future Alpha walking towards me. His dark green eyes lock with my own and I already know he&#039;s had a bad night. After all, his date is not beside him and his hair is all messed up from the last time I saw him. &quot;What about yours?&quot; I ask, looking back to the crowd as I can feel his eyes on the exposed skin of my back. Mother fell head over heels for this dress, showing it to me only for my heart to swell. I love this dress, a beautiful masterpiece of navy material, illusion sleeves with gems held in with the mesh that suits my skin color, the mermaid style beautiful as the end flares out just enough for easy maneuvering, and the back is open with crystals lining the material.<br /> &quot;She decided to leave my side a little early,&quot; Flynn mumbles, standing beside me as we look out upon the couples as a slow dance comes on.<br /> I spot him. His blond hair stands out from his suit, his brown eyes locked on a certain individual as my heart feels a sharp sting. I want to cry. I hold myself calm and remind myself of what I have to do. Of how I have to put on a show. Watching, I notice how he looks at her, how he reaches out his hand for the girl so gently. The second she takes his hand, he pulls her in, twirling her around as I hear her beautiful laugh. It&#039;s beautiful, at least, that&#039;s how he described it the first time he told me about her. He told me about how her laugh and smile could make anyone fall head over heels for her. She holds his heart and he&#039;s certainly fine with that.<br /> What does she have that I do not? She&#039;s got ginger hair that falls to her shoulders, tonight it&#039;s curled with her bangs braided back. She&#039;s got beautiful bright green eyes I would love to have, a tall yet thin body, and a gorgeous gold dress that is loose on her, yet she still pulls off the look. &quot;Let me guess,&quot; Flynn begins, leaning back against the balcony as he faces me. &quot;Trouble in paradise or did she backstab you?&quot;<br /> Meeting his eyes, I shake my head, looking back to the couple as he spins her around once more and they begin the slow dance. &quot;She didn&#039;t do anything to me...&quot; I trail off, my voice soft as Flynn leans in closer. &quot;She did nothing.&quot;<br /> He raises an eyebrow. &quot;What did she do to him? You don&#039;t like her. You don&#039;t like her dating your best friend so what&#039;s up?&quot;<br /> A single tear rolls down my cheek, my hand flying up to brush it away as my wolf stirs within me. Arms wrap around my smaller frame, his body hard compared to mine as all I want is for him to hold me like this. For him to look at me the way he does to her. But it can never happen. No. Because we are best friends and he has always made that clear. I&#039;ve tried. Three years I&#039;ve know him, and for one year I&#039;ve known who he is to me, yet I&#039;ve seen him fall for someone who just randomly showed up one day. He fell head over heels for her and I had no control over it.<br /> &quot;I&#039;m fine,&quot; I whisper, relaxing in Flynn&#039;s embrace as his dark green eyes meet mine once more.<br /> He shakes his head. &quot;You&#039;re a mess, Amory.&quot; I nod my head, knowing that Flynn is right and there&#039;s nothing I can do about it. He knows. He knows my suffering because he&#039;s seen me lose my sanity and run off. &quot;Anyone would be in your state.&quot;<br /> &quot;I just want to forget him. I just want to forget them together. I want to tell him, so damn bad I want to tell him...&quot; I trail off. &quot;But I can&#039;t because he&#039;s a damn human.&quot;<br /> Flynn nods, resting his chin on my shoulder as I take one last look at the couple that people love to death. &quot;He&#039;s my mate and I&#039;m watching him fall in love with someone else.&quot;<br /> &quot;What are you going to do?&quot; Flynn asks, his lips brushing my ear as I think of just leaving this town.<br /> &quot;I&#039;m going to move away,&quot; I pause, &quot;and never look back.&quot;<br /> I can recall years ago, exactly to the day I met him and we hit it off. He was outgoing and I was the typical shy girl finding her place in high school. For him, high school was a social experience where he made friends while he also learned. To him, I was the shy girl who some people knew and he wanted to know me, he wanted to make another friend. We become best friends, doing everything together from talking in the hall to having crazy experiences that we would laugh about for years to come. He was my muse. He broke the shell of the shy girl and devoted most of his time to me. But friends is all we ever could be. The night I turned seventeen and found that he was my mate, I was broken.<br /> How do you tell your best friend that you love them more than a friend? It&#039;s hard. It&#039;s nerve racking...especially when you know they don&#039;t have eyes for you in that way.<br /> I stand in the hallway, the school busy as chatter is all around me. Countless stores from prom night still are talked about, some of the couple&#039;s still together as they smile and laugh. One couple has caught my eye in particular, the couple that is breaking my heart and have no clue about it. What does Molly Moore have that I do not? She has my best friend and my one true mate, Augustus Brown.<br /> I tear my eyes away as they walk down the hall, knowing that they will stop by me and have a small conversation. I know what will happen tonight for them. Augustus told me. He told me he was taking her to our favorite local restaurant. Grabbing the handle to my locker, I open it up and put a few books inside, wondering if I could just avoid them and leave for the day. Maybe I should. But if I cannot make it through this day then I cannot make it through the last two weeks of school. I have two weeks and then the summer begins. Once the summer is over, I plan on leaving and never looking back. I cannot live in a town where my mate is with someone else. Hell, I cried myself to sleep last night and prom night all because I cannot even reject my mate without him knowing I am not human.<br /> I make my decision, heading for my next class and skipping the talk with Augustus and Molly. I have to get away from them at least. I cannot do that kind of torture and put on a happy face. Wearing masks will only hurt you at the end of the day more than you wish.<br /> &quot;You&#039;re going to have to face him sometime,&quot; I mutter to myself, passing Flynn and his future Beta, Cole, on the way to my first class. Even though Flynn&#039;s date dumped him two nights ago, he&#039;s already got a girl back by his side. She&#039;s werewolf, from our pack, and in the drama club here. I recall her being a sweetheart, but Flynn seems to bring out the worst in all of these girls. &quot;Just think of the two weeks remaining and you&#039;ll be fine.&quot;<br /> I enter my math class, taking a seat in the middle as no one is even in here. It&#039;s a ghost town and I have a good reason to be here, twenty minutes early. Molly is in this class as well, a straight A student with no teacher ever finding her a torture to teach. She&#039;s someone you cannot hate. She&#039;s someone, that although she has my mate, I could never hate her. Why? Because she has done nothing to me, hell, she only knows me as Augustus&#039; best friend and nothing more. To her I&#039;m just someone to get along with because she is dating my best friend for all she knows. She&#039;s with the man fate has paired me up with.<br /> The minutes fly by and soon, after everyone has taken their seats, the room quiets down and a chair scratches across the floor. I already know who it is by their scent and the fact that we do this every Friday. &quot;Run tomorrow morning before the sunrise? It will be fun,&quot; Flynn asks, putting his backpack down as he takes his seat beside me. &quot;We&#039;ve missed you lately.&quot;<br /> I shrug. &quot;Things have changed.&quot; He nods, knowing what I am referring to, how I don&#039;t like shifting that much. Every Tuesday morning a group of ten of us would meet up at four in the morning by the pack house and we run and watch the sunrise. The last time I took part in the event was four months ago. Four months ago when Augustus told me that he was in love with Molly.<br /> &quot;Your loss, Amory,&quot; he mutters just as the whiteboard is filled with Calculus and we spend the next hour taking notes. Every now and then Flynn will write something on my paper and have a small conversation. It mostly consists of school topics or pack business. You might be thinking why the future Alpha and I girl like me have conversations for, after all, the majority of werewolves at this school question it as well. It&#039;s as if there&#039;s some unspoken rule that if the future Alpha associates himself with an individual of the opposite sex, that they must have some tie to them. What&#039;s my tie to Flynn?<br /> None. I simply joined his group of friends two years ago for early morning runs and we hit it off. I&#039;ve seen him break up with countless girls, one in particular that caused him to knock on my window one night and just stay the night as he was heartbroken. She tossed him away the second she found someone else. She was a and I agreed with him.<br /> As the class ends and I leave the room as fast as possible, who awaits me the second I make it to the staircase causes my heart to skip a beat. Augustus stands there, hands in his pocket, his eyes upon me, and a smile on his face. &quot;Amory!&quot; I offer him a weak smile. &quot;Where were you this morning?&quot;<br /> &quot;I was late,&quot; I lie, not even taking the time for a pause to occur between the two of us. He simply raises an eyebrow and watches me as I look over my shoulder. I want to go for a run, I want to feel the wind in my hair and my paws hitting the ground. My wolf doesn&#039;t want to. She wants to be locked away. She&#039;s still mourning the loss of a mate. We know we have lost him. &quot;I&#039;ve got to get to my next class.&quot;<br /> &quot;You&#039;ve never cared about being punctual,&quot; Augustus comments, stepping forward as his scent envelops me and my body instantly becomes warm. &quot;Are you okay? Is there something wrong? Did I do something?&quot;<br /> Yes. He did something. He did something without even having the knowledge to know that he did it.<br /> &quot;I&#039;m fine, nothing wrong,&quot; I say, my voice chirpy as I can hear Molly calling his name. &quot;I&#039;ll leave the two of you.&quot; Stepping away, I scurry up the steps of the school, my legs feeling like jelly as I can hear them laughing down below. All I want is for Augustus to be by my side, for him to cuddle me, hold me, confess his feeling for me, and make me feel like I&#039;m the only girl in the world day after day after day. But he cannot. He has someone else and he is in love with her.<br /> &quot;Amory!&quot; I can hear him call out, the sound of his shoes against the pavement allowing me to know how far away he is. Simply, I take in a slow and deep breath, turning around to see Augusts chasing after me, worry in his eyes as my heart swells. At least I know that he cares for me, that he is drawn to me...but as a friend. As nothing more but a friend. It hurts me to realize. It hurts me to acknowledge. &quot;You have some explaining to do. You&#039;re acting like we&#039;re in some fight.&quot;<br /> I see Molly follow quickly behind him, her slender legs covered by a simple pair of jeans, her flat chest covered by a pretty white blouse. She&#039;s the girl that could wear a sun dress any day of the year and no one would question her, for they would not be able to take their eyes off her. She&#039;s not hot, not sexy, but she&#039;s beyond beautiful. She&#039;s the classy beautiful that lets you know she holds herself to high standards, has self control, and cares deeply for everyone. She doesn&#039;t get selfish. Augustus fell for her. He fell for the perfect girl, while his perfect match has been beside him for three years.<br /> &quot;Augustus, please, I&#039;m tired right now and have a migraine,&quot; I inform, Augustus coming to a halt as he stands before me. Molly follows quickly behind, offering me a gentle smile as my wolf growls within me. I haven&#039;t heard from my wolf in hours. &quot;I need to go.&quot;<br /> &quot;What&#039;s wrong, Amory?&quot; Augustus asks. Pain fills my heart as I watch Molly take his hand, their fingers interlocking as all I can feel is pain. Pain. He causes me not only mental pain, but physical. Physical because I cannot reject him, because any moment I try and shift into my wolf, she digs herself deeper into a hole and I feel a pain within my chest.<br /> &quot;Nothing.&quot;<br /> Unlocking my car, I leave them alone, driving off as my vision blurs. The waterworks occur as I drive, my hands shaking as sobs escape my mouth. Not wanting to go home, I pull over onto the side of the road, right to the entrance of the private drive to the pack house. I used to spend tons of time at the pack house until a year ago when I realized I had found my mate. Now, it is a distant memory, yet a warm one, one when I didn&#039;t feel pain every time I saw my mate. Back then I didn&#039;t have to watch my mate fall in love with someone else.<br /> There&#039;s a knock on my car window. I jump, looking out to see a familiar face. Quickly I wipe away my tears, composing myself as I roll down the window and fake a smile. &quot;Hey.&quot;<br /> &quot;Get into the passenger&#039;s seat, I&#039;m taking you home, you&#039;re in no state to drive,&quot; he announces. Looking over my shoulder, I see his car parked behind mine, a girl looking pissed as she sits in there with no idea what to do.<br /> &quot;What about your date?&quot; I ask. &quot;I can drive myself back home.&quot;<br /> Flynn, shakes his head. &quot;Get in the passenger seat, Amory, I&#039;m driving you home,&quot; he demands, his Alpha voice present as I know he&#039;s serious. Sighing, I climb over to the passenger seat, watching as Flynn hops into my Prius, rolling his eyes at the music playing. Turning off the music, he puts the car in drive and pulls out back onto the street. I look back around, seeing his date driving his car, his most prized possession as his parents spend a shitload on it. &quot;You&#039;re in no state to be driving.&quot;<br /> &quot;Thanks, dad,&quot; I mutter, tone flooded with sarcasm as I look outside to see the trees pass by. &quot;Thank you.&quot;<br /> Flynn nods, meeting my gaze as I know he cares. He wants me to get home safe. He&#039;s doing what every Alpha should do: care for the pack members. Care for them even when they want to push the world away.<br /> The ride is silent, the radio softly playing as my shoulders are tense. The trees pass by quickly as my eyes glance to the side mirror, watching Flynn&#039;s date driving his car as she follows in pursuit. Looking back to the road, I recross my legs, the atmosphere tense as I just want to be alone, in the silence, my mind empty, and my heart no longer in pain. Flynn drives my car, his eyes locked on the road as he seems relaxed to me, his posture relaxed, hands on the wheel, and not in some horrible state like myself. To the world, he is free. He is not tied down to a world of emotions that eat you alive because your mate is with another. Has he found his mate? No. How do I know? When an Alpha finds his Luna, they cannot stop talking about her or even keep their eyes off of her, not to mention everyone would know by now. He has not found his mate, and I know he is growing impatient because everyone else is finding theirs.<br /> &quot;Do you plan on rejection?&quot; Flynn asks, breaking the silence as my heart plummets to the floor. Those eyes flash through my mind and all I can focus on is a set of dreams. A set of dreams I&#039;ve envisioned for months and months. Moments that wake me up at night, bringing me to tears as the rest of the night is filled with darkness and the sense of feeling as if I could never find another. Augustus is the perfect guy...the one my mother would love to see me being home and my father approve of. I&#039;ve dreamt of us, of if we could be together. Moments of laughter and joy as we create a story to tell our children.<br /> Augustus is the perfect guy.<br /> But that doesn&#039;t mean he&#039;s the perfect match.<br /> &quot;No,&quot; I whisper, meeting Flynn&#039;s gaze as we pull up outside my house. As the engine shuts off, Flynn leans back in the seat, crossing his arms as my throat runs dry. &quot;If I reject him he deserves the truth of what I am.&quot; He nods. &quot;A human learning of our existence can be severely punishable, Flynn, and by rejecting Augustus I would be risking my life.&quot; Flynn nods once more, checking his phone as his car pulls up beside us. The window rolls down and his date for the night looks to us.<br /> &quot;Flynn, come on, let&#039;s go,&quot; she states, hopping out of the driver side as she walks around. She&#039;s impatient and I don&#039;t want to keep her waiting.<br /> Sighing, I open my door, offering Flynn&#039;s date a gentle smile. &quot;He&#039;s all yours.&quot; She rolls her eyes, yet offers me a smile in return. I like her. I like what I&#039;ve seen, not because she&#039;s the best I&#039;ve ever met, but because she hasn&#039;t cussed me out and claimed I was her so-called boyfriend. She&#039;s pretty. She&#039;s like all the rest. With black hair that hits her shoulders in gentle curls, tan skin, slender and long legs, bright golden eyes, and a light sprinkle of freckles, she&#039;s exactly what Flynn would look for: able to turn heads. I&#039;ve never talked with her before, but I know her name.<br /> &quot;Miranda,&quot; Flynn greets, opening the passenger door of his car for her. His eyes meet mine once more and he shuts the door, tossing me my keys. &quot;Take care.&quot; I thank Flynn for the ride, heading up for the front door of my house. &quot;Amory?&quot; I turn around to see Flynn about to hop into his his. &quot;Come for a run in the morning, let loose and relax.&quot;<br /> I can&#039;t. &quot;I&#039;ll try,&quot; I reply, knowing full well that I will be unable to. Unable to because I cannot shift. I cannot shift into my damn wolf because of some stupid broken heart. And how do you mend a broken heart? You move on. But how? How do you move on when there is not set standard on how to? Everyone mends their own differently and the only path I can see out of this is through forgetting. Through slowly pushing away the world and escaping. They warn you about running from your problems because they will only come to bit you in the ass. It&#039;s seen as karma. But what happens when our problems are picked upon in a society where tradition is? As a wolf, I am tied down to a pack and taught that the pack is my life, that I am part of a pack. But my problem exists within this pack, within this town. I have to run.<br /> Run because once I&#039;m out of here, my problems will be gone. Problem of being unable to be with or even reject my mate because he is human. Because I would risk my life, for if Augustus were to tell a soul, the Wolf King would come for me or my Alpha would make me rogue.<br /> Opening up the front door, the smell of cooked food fills my lungs and I can hear my parents in the kitchen discussing the day. They are mates. More than that, they are high school sweethearts as well who have been in love for twenty-three years. My father came from this pack and my mother as well.<br /> I skip the dinner, rather passing by the kitchen as I head down the hallway to my room. Putting my backpack upon the floor, I place myself upon the bed, running a hand through my hair.<br /> He&#039;s beautiful. He&#039;s perfection. He&#039;s exactly what I&#039;ve ever wanted, the very creation of my dreams.<br /> He watches me, not feeling a thing different as we make eye contact. After all, to him, this day is simply my birthday and not the day that I&#039;ve noticed him as my mate.<br /> &quot;Amory, you okay?&quot; One of my friends asks, pulling my attention off of my mate as my wolf wants to be let loose and run after him. Nodding, I walk through the crowd of school, heading after him as I pick up his scent.<br /> Hallway after hallway I follow his scent, on cloud nine as I spot him, leaning against his locker as he shoves a book into his bag. Making my way over to him, I stop in my steps, my eyes following his own.<br /> He&#039;s in a trance, those beautiful eyes not looking at me, but following a beautiful ginger as she crosses the hallway. He watches her with hope and deep interest.<br /> He looks at her the way I look at him.<br /> He looks at her as if she...is his.<br /> Tears flow down my cheeks, a hand covering my mouth as I let out a sob. The day I discovered he was my mate I watched him look at another. That day I lost myself.<br /> I lost my identity and my heart.<br /> I&#039;m running out of time.<br /> I&#039;m running out of time because he is supposed to be mine. He is supposed to be my forever yet to me, he is my greatest poison. I&#039;m like Socrates. He&#039;s my hemlock and I&#039;ve taken a drink. I&#039;ve submerged my life into a world where all I can wonder if he notices me, if he will ever look at me the way that he looks at her. I&#039;ve poisoned myself with love and have found myself slowly falling into an endless abyss.<br /> I have to tell myself everyday that it&#039;s okay, that one day it will all get better and maybe, just maybe Augustus will be mine one day. That one day the Moon Goddess will understand the pain I have suffered and reward me in the end...but this is what a blind person would say.<br /> My phone rings.<br /> Checking the ID, my stomach twists into knots and my skin pales.<br /> &quot;Hey.&quot;<br /> He&#039;s silent for a few seconds. &quot;I miss you, Amory.&quot; My heart clenches. I wished he missed me in the way that I wanted him to. &quot;I know you have to be going through something...I don&#039;t know what, but I know you&#039;re hurting.&quot;

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