| Body |
"Watch, girl. This was just an hour ago." He pushes play and I helplessly watch as Scarlet, a club bunny, rides Axel while Hendrix pounds into her from behind and Jax thrusts into her mouth.
It feels like my insides are shutting down. I can't breathe. I'm not sure if I even want to at this point. This isn't real, it can't be happening. They wouldn't ... they wouldn't do this to me.
There's no hope for me. He's right, no one is coming to rescue me. No one even knows what's really happening. I hate Scarlet, but at the same time I know they think I left them for someone else. They've been manipulated as well. Brent is dead because of me, I deserve this pain.
They didn't even wait long before replacing me. The voice in my head says.
My best friend was murdered because of me. My guys think I betrayed them and easily replaced me within hours. My family will think I abandoned them. I have nothing. I am nothing.
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Dani pov
"Are you excited about tonight, Dani girl?" Amanda, my pseudo aunt, asks as she helps me finish curling my long blonde hair. I look at her through the reflection in the mirror and she must see the happiness shining in my eyes because she pecks the top of my head. "Right, stupid question."
"Excited isn't a big enough word to encomphip how I'm feeling right now. I'm just... God, I don't know, Mandy." I laugh at my lack of words and she squeezes my shoulders while smiling at me.
"You're going to be an amazing Old Lady to those three boys of yours. This club has watched the four of you fall in love and we are all just as excited for it to be official now." I see tears shining in her eyes but she blinks them away before they can fall. "You, my sweet girl, deserve all the happiness in the world, and I know those boys will bend over backwards to make it happen. The circumstances that brought you into our lives weren't ideal, but this is where you were always meant to be."
I've called the Devil's Disciples club home for eight years now, ever since my father abandoned me at a gas station when I was only ten years old, and told me I'm old enough to fend for myself.
A lot of bad could have happened to me back then, but I was fortunate enough to be found by Snake, the club's president. He put me on the back of his bike and brought me to the club, giving me a family, and a real future in the process.
Snake's son, Axel, and his two best friends, Jax and Hendrix, quickly became my everything. I got to grow up being a spoiled club princess with my three best friends.
To absolutely no one's surprise, our platonic friendship changed into so much more the older we got. If I'm honest with myself, I've been in love with them since the moment we met.
Snake was surprisingly happy for us, but he demanded we not take our relationship further until after I graduated school and turned eighteen. I won't lie, it's been frustrating keeping our hands to ourselves for two years, but tonight is finally the night we've been waiting for.
Tonight Axel, Jax, and Hendrix are being officially patched in and I'm being named as their Old Lady. I graduated a month ago and my eighteenth birthday was last week. It's time.
Hendrix, my big softy, wanted us to all wait to be intimate until after everything was officially recognized by the club. Something about 'The biker version of making an honest woman out of me.' Axel wanted to punch him in the face for being a schlong blocker, but eventually relented because, in his words, I'm worth the wait.
"I'm going to head out, hun. I need to make sure everything is in order for tonight at the club." Mandy says, while grabbing her purse to leave. "The ceremony starts in about an hour, don't be late." She gives me a stern look, knowing I would be late to my own funeral if possible.
"Trust me, tonight is the one night I'll definitely be on time for." I grin at her. She shakes her head in amusement.
"We'll see. Taylor drew you a picture as a keepsake for tonight. When she gives it to you, act like it's the best artwork you've ever seen. She worked hard on it for her favorite person."
"See you in a bit, Dani girl!" She waves bye and gets in her car. Once I see her headlights disappear, I go back inside and make sure everything is ready for after the ceremony tonight.
Call me optimistic, but I bought a whole box of condoms. I also bought some scented candles and advil. I'm sure Hendrix made a gift basket with all the essentials, but I like to be prepared. It's not every day a girl loses her first time to the three loves of her life.
I'm just finishing my mental checklist when my phone dings, letting me know the guys are active in the group chat. I can't help the bubble of laughter that escapes at their banter.
Axel: Are u ready for tonight, Baby girl?
Jax: Do u really have 2 ask? Our girl has been ready. If Hendrix wasn't such a clam jammer she would have jumped us weeks ago.
Hendrix: Get out, Jax. Little one, you deserve for your first time to be special.
Axel: It's ALL of our first time's, schlong. No matter what it will be special.
Axel: So, who will be first, Baby girl?
Jax: I nominate myself. *Winky face emoji*
Hendrix: Of course u do. *Eye roll emoji*
Hendrix: The choice is yours, little one. Don't feel pressured.
Me: I love you guys. And I don't care who goes first. I'll leave that for you guys to decide, as long as it actually happens.
Axel: I'm so hard right now.
Jax: Same. Can we speed up the ceremony?
Axel: I tried. Dad would angry if everything isn't done by the book.
Hendrix: Heathens, both of you. Learn some patience.
Hendrix: I love you too, Little one. Can't wait to see you in a bit.
Axel: Go on with you! Hendrix.Love you too, Baby girl.
Jax: Yeah, Go on with you! Hendrix. Also, I love you more, Love.
Me: You guys are dorks. Finish getting ready for tonight b4 Snake gives you grunt work.
I put my phone down and try to relax before it's time to leave for the clubhouse. I only live five minutes away, but it feels like a million with how antsy I am right now.
The house I currently live in used to belong to Amanda and Scoot, but they gave it to me my senior year of highschool after they built their new house on the club's property. Before here, I stayed at the clubhouse in one of the rooms, but I like my solitude.
Don't get me wrong, I love the club, but I like being able to walk downstairs in the middle of the night for a glhip of water without having to see some club bunny getting railed on the table where I eat breakfast by someone I consider family. The members of the club are family to me, but it doesn't mean I want to see their schlongs out. That's just nasty.
Since the guys and I are becoming official tonight, they will be moving in here with me this weekend. Jax even took the liberty of buying a monster of a bed for all of us to sleep on. My house is finally becoming an actual home.
I'm brought out of my thoughts when I hear a loud knock on my door. I can't keep the smile off my face as I go to answer, knowing Axel wouldn't be able to stay away for long.
"Hendrix will kick your bu–" I open the door and my words die on my tongue when I see who it is.
"Dani, You look good. Just like your momma did before she got knocked up with you." My father says, with a toothy grin on his sallow face.
He looks worse than he did eight years ago when he left me at the gas station. He's scrawny, with rotted out teeth, and a sweaty complexion.
"Wh-what are you doing here?" I croak out, hating how weak I sound even to my own ears.
"Dani, Dani, Dani."He shakes his head in disappointment. "That's no way to greet your daddy. You didn't think I would forget about you did you? I've gotten myself into some trouble, girl, and only you can help me out." He tells me with a nasty gleam in his eyes. Bile is making its way up my throat now. I should have known he would never truly be done with me.
"If you try anything, anything at all to hurt me, the entire Devil's Disciples club will come for you. They'll know it was you." I tell him with as much courage as my terrified voice will allow. He just laughs cruelly at me.
I try to slam the door in his face but his boot stops me. Before I get a chance to turn and run he stabs me with something. He pulls back his hand and I see a syringe. Before my next thought is complete my world turns black.
I wake with a jolt as my consciousness slowly comes back. Looking around I see that I'm tied up in the back of a van and my father is here with me, staring at me with dead eyes. Eyes he's always had when he looks at me.
"You're finally awake." He says casually, like we're talking about the weather. I don't respond. What would I even say? It doesn't matter though. My guys will come looking for me and this will all be over. I just need to be patient.
"I see those wheels turning in your head, girl. No one is coming for you." He has a wide smile on his face as he says this.
"You're wrong. Axel, Jax, and Hendrix will always come for me. When they do, they will kill you!" I scream at him.
"Not after they found your note, explaining that the biker life isn't for you and a photo of you and that friend of yours in a compromising position."
"What note? What friend? What are you talking about?" None of what he's saying makes sense.
"That friend of yours from school, Brent. According to the note and a photo a friend of mine edited, you and Brent fell in love and you decided to run off together."
"Brent is gay and I would never cheat on them! They know I wouldn't. They'll see right through it and come for me." I know it down to my bones.
"Well Brent disappeared last night too, after I put a magazine in his head and buried him in the desert. So it's all very convincing, what with you both disappearing at the same time and all." He laughs like any of what he just said is funny.
"No. No, no, no! He's not dead! Please. You're lying. Brent is innocent." The last part is barely a whisper as my emotions clog my throat. Brent is a good person. This is my fault. If he was never my friend he wouldn't have been caught up in this mess.
"I wasn't sure if I could pull this off. I've been watching you for some time and I figured those boys of yours would hunt you down for some answers at least. Imagine my surprise when my friend sent me a video of all three of them banging one of them club whores not long after leaving your place. They sure didn't wait long to replace you. Must not have been that special to them after all, huh, Dani girl?" He smirks at me. I want to rip that smirk off his stupid face.
"Now I know you're lying. I won't fall for your tricks, I know them better than anyone, and they wouldn't ever touch a club girl, no matter how upset they were at me." He pulls out his phone and puts it in front of my face.
"Watch, girl. This was just an hour ago." He pushes play and I helplessly watch as Scarlet, a club bunny, rides Axel while Hendrix pounds into her from behind and Jax thrusts into her mouth.
It feels like my insides are shutting down. I can't breathe. I'm not sure if I even want to at this point. This isn't real, it can't be happening. They wouldn't... they wouldn't do this to me.
"Ah now you're getting it." He puts his phone back into his pocket and grabs my chin roughly. "Ya know, I never wanted a kid, let alone a daughter. Women are useless. It wasn't until recently that I realized you can actually be of some value to me after all. I owe someone a lot of money, and unfortunately I wasn't able to pay them back. I did have you though. It took some time to track you down but imagine my surprise when I found you living with a biker club. I had to get creative to finally get you away from those boys of yours, but after some help I figured it out. The guy you're going to isn't very nice but if you play your cards right you should be fine." I say nothing.
There's no hope for me. He's right, no one is coming to rescue me. No one even knows what's really happening. I hate the guys for banging Scarlet, but at the same time I know they think I left them for someone else. They've been manipulated as well. Brent is dead because of me, I deserve this pain.
They didn't even wait long before replacing me. The voice in my head says.
I had everything. I had a family, three amazing boyfriends, and a bright future. I had it all. Now, now I have nothing.
I can feel what little hope I had left leave my soul as my mind replays that video in my head on repeat.
My best friend was murdered because of me. My guys think I betrayed them and easily replaced me within hours. My family will think I abandoned them. I have nothing. I am nothing.
"We've got a long drive and I don't feel like listening to you whine." I realize I'm crying when he says this. He pulls out another syringe and stabs me in the arm with it. I don't even try to fight him.
Later on when I wake up, chained to a basement floor with several other girls, I realize...I was a stupid, foolish, naive little girl and life can always get worse.
7 years later
The base runs through me, syncing with my heart. My body sways in time with the beat as I lift my arms up and embrace the feeling of freedom. I'll never take it for granted again.
My black rooted, silver hair is up in a faux hawk to keep it from sticking to my neck. My dark winged brown eyes open as a pair of hands grab ahold of my hips and the person behind me grinds into my hip. Thick fingers trail up by undressed stomach and grope my leather bralette covered breasts. I don't even need to turn around to know who is behind me.
So predictable.
Kyle Sandcliff, 32, trust fund baby, and overall waste of human life.
I grab his hand from my chest and pull him along with me to the unlocked 'Employees only' break room. Once we're both in the room, I close and lock the door before turning around to face him. He doesn't waste any time as he pins me to the door and shoves his tongue down my throat. I give as good as I get before I bite his bottom lip, drawing blood.
"Baby. You're a feisty one." He says, before he immediately undoes his pants and pulls his tiny schlong out.
"Get on your knees and suck me, baby. If you're a good girl, I'll reward you with my fat schlong in your private part." Wow, what he lacks in size, he makes up for in confidence.
I get on my knees and lick the head of his schlong. This guy doesn't wash his balls very well. It smells like rank hip. But a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do. So I take one for the team and shove his entire schlong in my mouth. The smell makes me gag and dipshit thinks it's because of his size. Typical.
"That's it baby, choke on my schlong." He grunts.
God, please stop talking.
I need to end this before I actually throw up. I grab my dagger from my boot and slowly bring it to his thigh while his eyes are closed. His schlong starts to swell so I pull him from my mouth.
"What, I was almost there!" He yells, as he looks down.
As soon as his eyes lock on mine I shove my blade deep in his femoral artery and drag it down, effectively slicing it open. He screams but the music drowns him out. His voice dies down as he bleeds out. I look him deep in his fading eyes.
"My name is Karma, and this is for the force woman to intercourse with him and murder of Veronica Douglhip."
Once his black soul finally leaves his body, and goes to inferno where it belongs, I wipe my blade on his Oxford shirt and pull my cell from my pocket.
"Emery, package pickup confirmed." I tell my partner.
"Received." Is all she says before the call is disconnected.
I stroll out of the crowded Miami club, and walk two blocks where I destroy and toss the burner cell. I walk another two blocks and Emery is there to pick me up. I get in the black 1967 Shelby Mustang and we take off for the private air strip where I finally get to brush my teeth and use half a bottle of mouthwash after we load the jet. I come out of the small bathroom to Emery's smirking face.
"Shut up, bimbo." But she just bursts out laughing.
"I don't know why you insist on going so far with your marks before you kill them. You know, you wouldn't have to deal with cheese balls if you did what I do and just kill them as soon as you get them alone instead of playing with them." She repeats the same thing she says to me every time I do a job. I just roll my eyes and sit down.
"I enjoy edging them before I end their lives. Imagine using a vibrator and right before you come the batteries die." She winces at this.
"Yeah that is terrible. I hate when that happens." She tells me.
"Exactly. For them, instead of batteries dying, it's them dying. It's very cathartic for me." I tell her with a shrug.
"You're psychotic, but I love you all the more for it." She grins at me and I just wink at her.
I don't get close to people. Not since seven years ago when my life irrevocably changed. Don't get me wrong, I would absolutely take a magazine for Emery, and she's like family to me. But I will never allow myself to be vulnerable with someone else. She knows this, she even understands this.
We got plastered one night and I spilled my guts about the boys who shattered my heart when I was abducted. So she knows why I keep a distance. She hates it, but she learned not to push me too much a while ago. That's why I requested to have Emery as my partner. She doesn't pry.
"What does the boss lady say about our next mission?" I ask. "Please tell me it's in the Caribbean or somewhere just as peaceful." I whine.
"Sorry babe, it's in Nevada." My lungs stop working. Nevada. No. I swore to myself I would never step foot back in that state. It still hurts too bad to think about. Being that close to them would kill me.
"A group requested our help with some missing women. Apparently several women have been going missing in the past year and so far nothing has been found that can lead to any clues. It's like they just vanished into thin air. The group reached out through one of our past clients and requested our help. They are paying triple what we usually ask for because they're so desperate." She tells me all this, and I hear it, I swear I do, but all I can focus on is her saying Nevada.
"What group is asking for our help?" I ask her, with my heart in my throat.
"A motorcycle club. The Devil's Disciples." As soon as the words leave her mouth my breath heaves from my lungs and my throat closes up. This can't be happening. The world can't be so cruel.
"Karma, are you ok?" Emery frantically asks me.
"I'm fi...fine." I manage to choke out. "When do we head there?"
"Tonight. We meet with them tomorrow night to get started. They requested to work the case with us, much to the boss lady's annoyment. But they hipured us they won't get in the way and understand we will be leading the case." She rolls her eyes at this.
Our boss, who we call 'Boss Lady', saved my life and ever since then I've worked for her at 'The company'. Basic names I know, but it keeps everything anonymous. Especially when we kill people for a living. I can't decide not to work a case. I owe my boss my life. Plus, how selfish would it be for me to abandon innocent women in need of saving just because I'm reluctant to face my past? My boss found and saved me when I was in a similar situation six years ago. I'll swallow my pride and pull up my bad bimbo panties to get this job done and then I'll close out that page in my life for good.
Doesn't mean I have to like it though.
Terrible Nevada.
It's not the state's fault, really. I know this. I still hate this place, though. It's the place where my dreams started to come true and it's the place where they inevitably crashed and burned...and then went through a meat grinder.
Isn't it funny how life turns out? No, you're right. It's not funny. It's horrifying.
I won't lie, a tiny part of me is anticipating seeing my boys again. No, not my boys. The boys. I'm just so angry at them and hurt. They hurt me. I know technically they were played too. They got a note along with a photoshopped picture of me and another man doing God knows what, telling them that I didn't want them and that I was running off with someone else. I know they only screwed Scarlet to get back at me because they were hurting too. It doesn't make watching them do it hurt any less though. The evil part of me wants to make them suffer a little. The sad and lonely part wants to get everything cleared up and be back in their arms like nothing ever happened. That part needs to jump off a cliff though. I'm not the same person I was then and I never will be.
Too much has happened. Plus I know that if they ever found out the truth, they would hate themselves. They wouldn't be able to handle it. It's best to just leave the past where it is. No good can come from dredging up all that hurt and anguish.
Our plane got in last night, and we stayed at a cheap motel where we both immediately phiped out. We've been on back-to-back missions lately, and all the traveling can be exhausting. Boss lady informed us that Emery and I will be staying at the guy's clubhouse during this mission so we don't run the risk of drawing too much attention by going back and forth between the club and a hotel in case the place is being watched. I don't know why they would be watching the club but we should find out more details later tonight.
Emery is already at the club so she can get all her tech gear set up. I really should head over there but I'm being a coward right now.
It's been seven years. That's a long time to be gone without a trace, only to pop up out of nowhere.
I look at myself in the mirror and take stock of the differences between how the old me looked and how I look now. My blonde hair used to be a sun smooched shade, now it's mostly silver with black roots, and goes down my back to the top of my hip.
I have an athletic build with feminine curves compared to my tiny frame from before. Instead of girly pink and modest attire with bows, I mostly wear black and leave little to the imagination. The part that's changed the most are my eyes. They used to be so happy and full of life. Now they're dead and haunted. Not to mention the scars. My body is riddled with them now. They won't see those though. I have tattoos covering the ones visible through clothing. The ones on my back I couldn't cover though. I tried, but the scar tissue made it too painful. I got a tattoo on my spine that looks as if a snake is weaving around it. I couldn't handle any more work done. My skin was too sensitive for any more. Too much damage to the nerve endings and you have to find a really good artist who can tattoo deep set scar tissue without it looking blown out and weird.
Thinking about my tattoos makes me think about little Taylor and the odd drawings she used to make. I've always wondered if she ended up sticking with her love of art, and if she did what became of it.
I shake my head of those thoughts and finish looking myself over to make sure I'm ready.
My hair is in loose waves and I'm wearing my makeup as my armor. Full smokey eye with a bold winged liner and dark bold red lips. I'm wearing black distressed skinny jeans with a black lace corset top and a cropped leather jacket over top. Inside my jacket I have my blades and inside my knee high boots I have my two tactical guns. I'm never not prepared.
I've spent enough time procrastinating. Let's get this thing over with.
I need a vacation.
I park my matte black MV Agusta F4CC bike once I make it inside the gate at the compound. We're estimating being on this job for a little while, so I had my baby shipped overnight. I pull my helmet off and the urge to put it right back on and drive away hits me so hard that my hands start sweating.
I hate feeling weak and vulnerable. I collect myself and my emotions and firmly fix my emotionless mask on my face. There aren't too many people here tonight, so I'm hipuming there's no party going on.
Good, that means they're taking this mission seriously.
I climb the steps and manage not to reminisce on the memories of running down these steps into the guys arms when they would get back from road trips in the past. It's weird how this place used to feel so much like home, and now I'm practically a stranger walking into a new place.
I hate this.
I walk inside and see about fifteen people hanging out, drinking, and just enjoying themselves. I know Emery and the guys are in the room used for church, waiting on me. But I see someone sitting at the bar and can't help myself but to sit down next to them.
"I was wondering when you were going to finally come by, doll." He tells me.
"Yeah, well, would have been sooner if you told me about all the missing women before now." I snark back.
"I knew you were busy living your life. I knew you would come when you were ready." He looks at me and I immediately drop my mask.
"I'll never be ready, Snake. But I would have come and helped you. All you had to do was say so. You know that." I tell him sincerely.
"I know, doll." He pauses as his eyes take in my features.
"You look good." He tells me sincerely. I can see he's trying his best to hold in his emotions. I'm having the same issue since finally seeing him after all these years.
"So do you, Snake."
I reached out to Snake after my boss rescued me from inferno. I told him everything and he believed every word. He knew that letter and the photos were fake. How sad is that? He knew immediately, yet the three guys who said they were in love with me didn't for a second think it was anything other than real.
He told me he looked for me, but I vanished without a trace, much like the current missing girls. It's not easy hunting a ghost.
I kept in touch with Snake in secret over the years, I made him promise not to ever mention a word about any of it to the guys until I was ready to face them myself.
No matter what the circumstances were, they replaced me with another woman too easily. They didn't even try to find me, not even to scream at me for abandoning them like they believed I did. They just moved on with their lives while I was stuck in inferno.
I know Snake stepped down as President and let Axel take over, Jax became V.P, and Hendrix became the Enforcer. He slipped that information in one time during casual conversation and that was the last time I spoke to him. That was a year ago. He knew I didn't want to hear about them, it hurt too bad.
"You ready, doll?" Snake asks as he gets up from his stool.
"Not even a little. Lead the way." He nods his head and gives me a rehipuring smile but nothing he could do or say will make this any easier on me.
I walk behind Snake as we head to church. He walks in first and I walk around him and go up to Emery with my back to the room. I make sure I show no outward emotions as I fix my mask back into place.
I'm a new person. The old me died a long time ago. No matter who they used to be to me, I can't show weakness. Let's just solve this case so I can get out of here.
"Gentlemen, this is Karma. She's never missed a target and has a 1oo% success rate in search and rescue for kidnapped and imprisoned victims." Emery announces to the room.
I finally turn around and face my past. Snake has a big smirk on his face. Axel's eyes are bugging out of his head and his jaw is dropped. Jax looks like he's seen a ghost. And Hendrix...Hendrix looks ready to kill me.
"Long time, no see." I say with a smirk on my face and a flippant tone that I don't feel in the least. Let them think what they want, they abandoned me long before I gave up on them.
Axel pov
"What are you doing here?" Immediately comes out of my mouth. This selfish bimbo shows up now? After seven years?
I don't know what kind of cruel cosmic joke the devil is playing on me right now.
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