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| Body | "That we're divorced."<br /> "Are you serious, Laurel?" He pushed back in his seat, running a hand through his hair.<br /> "I know I'm sorry I should have told them. It's just at first when we were having trouble I thought we'd work it out then when the divorce happened .... I didn't know how to explain it to them."<br /> Their divorce was anything but normal Laurel had been home alone one night and men had broken into their home. A rival gang had beaten and violated her leaving her for Ivan's cousin Ezra to find, after that their marriage was strained and after seven months they finally agreed to call it quits.<br /> "So, they don't know about the violate either?"<br /> "They don't know you're a motorcycle club leader, they don't know you smuggle cocaine for a living, they don't know I run an opposing club and bimbo house. How would I explain the violate?"<br /> He fell silent, deep down he still blamed himself for what happened. Part of their divorce had been because Laurel healed and Ivan had not.<br /> ————————<br /> Laurel sighed as she climbed from her Cadillac in front of the strip club she owned and ran, she started across the parking lot just as her phone rang. She glanced at the caller ID seeing it was her mother she paused, debated not answering it.<br /> "Hello?"<br /> "Laurel, I've been trying to reach you!"<br /> "I'm sorry mother I've been busy."<br /> "Well, that's alright but tell me are you coming to the wedding?"<br /> "I....I don't know mom I'm pretty busy and it takes days to drive there..."<br /> "Oh please darling? You know Lydia would love to have you there and you haven't been home since Christmas."<br /> Laurel winced she wished she could go home more often and see her family but she couldn't she just had too many secrets from them.<br /> "I'll think about it," She said softly.<br /> "Very well then, I love you."<br /> "I love you too mom."<br /> She hung up and took a deep breath, somewhere along the way her lies had snowballed out of control and now here she was at the edge of the cliff she could either jump and end the fiasco or keep up with her tirades and hope it didn't push her off.<br /> She chose the latter, turning she crossed the parking lot and slipped back into her car. She drove across town the bar that her ex-husband Ivan owned. She sat in the parking lot for a few long minutes, hating herself for what she was about to do.<br /> Before she lost her nerve she climbed from her car and crossed the parking lot walking inside, she bypassed the bar section where the bartender was wiping things down and two bikers sat up chairs. Her husband was the president of the Trojans MC and once upon a time she was his vice president.<br /> She knocked on his private door, giving him a few minutes to answer and fidgeting.<br /> "Come in."<br /> She stepped into his office, closing the door behind her. The office looked the same, dark red carpet and dark mahogany walls with a large oak desk and a dangerous man behind it.<br /> "Laurel, what can I do for you?"<br /> "I...I need a favor." She said gently.<br /> "Okay, what can I do for you?"<br /> He wouldn't hesitate to help her, they had stayed friends after the divorce and he owed her so much. A few months ago he'd been in a war with a rival gang and Laurel had saved him in a raid, not long after that his cousin and best friend was murdered only Laurel had held him together. Ivan drank too heavily and had it not been for Laurel would have probably slipped into depression. Two weeks ago he had finally sobered up and returned to work.<br /> "Will...will you, come home with me?" She asked with a wince.<br /> "What back to your apartment?" He asked.<br /> "No back to...mayport..."<br /> Mayport falls, a rustic, hidden little town in the mountains. Population five hundred and nine and their hometown as children. Ivan hadn't stepped foot in that place since they're divorce his father lived nearby him in the city and he had no other family.<br /> "Mayport...why?"<br /> "Lydia is...getting married."<br /> Her cousin Lydia was the over achiever of the family, but Ivan was still confused. He and Laurel had been divorced for five years.<br /> "Okay, why do you need me?"<br /> "Remember when I said that my parents don't know I still gamble on the horses?" She asked.<br /> "Yes."<br /> It was right after Laurel had taken a magazine that was meant for him, she'd been in the hospital betting on horses and Ivan had chastised her for it.<br /> "Well....they also don't know about us."<br /> "Wait, don't know what?"<br /> "That we're divorced."<br /> "Are you serious, Laurel?" He pushed back in his seat, running a hand through his hair.<br /> "I know I'm sorry I should have told them. It's just at first when we were having trouble I thought we'd work it out then when the divorce happened....I didn't know how to explain it to them."<br /> Their divorce was anything but normal Laurel had been home alone one night and men had broken into their home. A rival gang had beaten and violated her leaving her for Ivan's cousin Ezra to find, after that their marriage was strained and after seven months they finally agreed to call it quits.<br /> "So, they don't know about the violate either?"<br /> "They don't know you're a motorcycle club leader, they don't know you smuggle cocaine for a living, they don't know I run an opposing club and bimbo house. How would I explain the violate?"<br /> He fell silent, deep down he still blamed himself for what happened. Part of their divorce had been because Laurel healed and Ivan had not.<br /> "How long?" He asked under his breath.<br /> "How long what?"<br /> "Will we be gone?"<br /> "Oh, I'd like to leave maybe tomorrow. I'm sure you remember it takes two days to get there and then that puts us there on Wednesday so....a little over a week maybe?" She said with a small wince.<br /> "Fine."<br /> "Really? You'll do it?" She asked daring to hope.<br /> "I'll do it because I owe you....a lot."<br /> "Thank you."<br /> "But you can't keep this charade going forever," He pointed out.<br /> "I know just help me get through this."<br /> "Of course I will."<br /> She offered him a beaming smile, relieved that he agreed to help her pull this off and already calculating how she could get out of this mess. She'd made it the passed five years by going to as few family events as possible and when she did go she always had an excuse for why Ivan wasn't there. Work, family duties, etc. Sometime she sent herself flowers from him apologizing for not being at her side, at first it was just to get by but then it became her way of life.<br /> "Thank you, for doing this." She said as she stood.<br /> "I'll pick you up tomorrow, nine work?"<br /> "Yes."<br /> He gave a small nod and she stood there awkwardly for a minute then with one last sigh of relief turned and hurried from the room. She needed to go home and pack, it was going to be a long couple of days.<br /> Ivan picked Laurel up the next morning in his large black suburban, she sighed heavily pushing back the anxiety that rose in her chest as he came to help with her luggage.<br /> "You never were a light packer," He said lifting one of the three heavy suitcases.<br /> "I can't help it, I nervous pack."<br /> "I remember," He teased.<br /> He tossed her bags a little roughly into the back of the vehicle before opening her door for her, she slid onto the leather seat as he walked to the driver side.<br /> If he was nervous about the upcoming week he didn't show it, just started the vehicle and pulled onto the street starting the long drive home. Their hometown, the one they met in, fell in love in, dated in, married in.<br /> "Will the club be okay with you gone?" She asked.<br /> Being a president of her own MC she knew how hard it was to leave them for long periods of time, anything could happen and they both needed to be sure that they're clubs were in good hands. Her Vice President was more than capable of handling anything that arose.<br /> "They'll be fine, Slater can handle it."<br /> "Slater....is...is he who...he replaced...."She fell silent.<br /> Ezra had been the vice president for years, knowing he was gone for good was hard to deal with. The three of them had been close growing up and closer as adults, Laurel missed Ezra. His easy friendship, his laugh, his soft eyes and kind nature, but Laurel had been so busy keeping Ivan together she didn't have time to be sad for herself.<br /> "Ezra......he replaced Ezra," Ivan said gently.<br /> "Right, Ezra."<br /> "I was thinking about going to France in the fall, seeing how Eve is doing."<br /> Eve was Ezra's girlfriend, a nun at a local Church where Ezra was assigned community hours, the two had fallen in love. Ezra had made sure that upon his death Eve was left with enough money to live comfortably for the rest of his life, this also provided enough money for her to adopt an orphaned baby that Ezra had cared deeply about a baby she then named Ezra.<br /> "She calls me once a week, she said little Ezra is growing like a weed." He added.<br /> "I bet he is."<br /> "If....if you wanted to come with me you could," he offered with a small shrug.<br /> "You wouldn't mind?"<br /> "No, I think Eve would like to see you."<br /> "It wouldn't be weird?"<br /> "What you mean more weird than spending a week pretending to be married?" He asked.<br /> She laughed a little, he was right the entire thing was bizarre. She should have been honest with her parents about their getting a divorce but she knew how much they adored Ivan and at the time she wasn't ready to talk about it.<br /> "I think I have a plan for this entire thing," She offered.<br /> "Let's hear it, I'm not doing this again."<br /> "Well what if towards the end of our stay we started to fight? We could start small and slowly escalate. A few days after we return home I'll call mom and tell her we're getting a divorce."<br /> "That could work I guess."<br /> "I'm sorry about all of this."<br /> "It's fine I owe you one....more than one actually."<br /> "You don't owe me anything and this is my mess."<br /> The pair fell silent with only the sound of the road rumbling to break the silence. The silence would have been more comfortable if it wasn't for the destination they were heading to and the reason they were together.<br /> Laurel let her head fall back against the head rest of the car, her eyelids heavy. She'd been up most of the night packing and planning, trying to think of anyway to get out of this situation. She slowly felt her muscles relax and slipped into a deep, dreamless sleep.<br /> Ivan glanced over at his ex-wife, or rather his wife for the week at least. How long had it even been since he'd referred to her as his wife. They'd been divorced so long he almost forgot what it was like being married to her, almost, but not completely and it was the almost part that kept him up at night thinking about her.<br /> Just a few weeks ago he'd been as drunk as a fiddler, cold barely stand on his own two feet. Laurel had innocently came over to try and help him and he'd made a blatant pass at her, practically begging her to go to bed with him. She'd refused, because she wasn't as drunk as a fiddler. Now, he felt like a heel, he'd been weak, drunk, and had only wanted her because she was comfortable.<br /> He knew Laurel, he'd been with Laurel, could remember every dip and valley on her body, her smell, her soft skin, the sounds she made, he remembered all of that and it made him comfortable asking for her help but being comfortable was dangerous, it would be too easy to slip back into that role that he once loved, her husband. He'd have to keep a tight leash on his feelings and emotions this week.<br /> He drove most of the day with her asleep in the passenger seat next to him, it was fine with him if she slept he didn't need conversation. Just having a presence in the seat beside him was enough to keep him content on the long drive.<br /> When he saw a small diner off the side of the road a few hours later he pulled over, he was starving and he knew that Laurel most likely hadn't ate breakfast. He turned off the car then reached over to lay a hand on her thigh giving her a gentle shake.<br /> "Laurel, wake up."<br /> She stirred slowly, she always was hard to wake up and a deep sleeper. Stretching she sat up better in the seat and looked around.<br /> "What time is it?" She asked with a yawn.<br /> "Four thirty, I need to stretch my legs and thought some food would be good."<br /> "I'm starving," She replied undoing her belt.<br /> She turned for the handle on the door but before she could a gentle hand on her shoulder stopped her.<br /> "Wait, Laurel....before we go inside."<br /> She turned to him obviously confused as he dug in his jacket pocket pulling out a red velvet box he handed it to her without looking at her.<br /> "If we're going to pull this off you're going to need that," He said.<br /> Taking the box she opened the lid to reveal her engagement ring and wedding band nestled inside, the same one they'd had when they were married. The same one she left on his kitchen table the night she left him for good.<br /> "You kept them."<br /> "Yeah, I did. I don't even know why but....I figured if we're going to do this then, you'll need them."<br /> She pulled them from the box and slid them into place only noticing now that his was already resting snugly on his hand. It looked odd seeing the thick, gold band on his left ring finger after years of it being uncovered but he didn't seem to notice it.<br /> "Thank you," She said softly.<br /> "Let's get some food."<br /> He was out of the vehicle before she could say anything else, she took just a minute to stare at her wedding rings in the light of the sunset. It felt odd having them back after so long but he was right they needed them to get away with this, rings never crossed her mind when she planned this trip but then that was Ivan.<br /> Always thinking of little things, always looking out for her, always making sure she had her bases covered even if she was getting them involved in ridiculous scheme.<br /> Laurel followed Ivan into the diner, he held the door for her like always and they picked a booth near the back of the diner. An older waitress with graying hair hurried to their table.<br /> "Hello dears, what can I get you for drinks?" She asked.<br /> "I'll have tea," Laurel said gently.<br /> "Water," Ivan said.<br /> The waitress hurried off and Laurel lifted her menu, scanning it for something to order. She glanced briefly at Ivan over the top of her menu, he was texting someone and she briefly wondered if it was a woman.<br /> "Who is watching your club while we are gone?" He asked.<br /> "Tanner," She replied, referring to her right hand man.<br /> "Oh, yeah, of course."<br /> She glanced at him, his tone was somewhat biting when he spoke.<br /> "What?" She asked.<br /> "What?" He asked, with a shrug.<br /> "That tone, what is it with you and Tanner? Why can't you just get along?"<br /> "I don't like him, I don't trust him and I...."He trailed off and shook his head.<br /> "You what? You can tell me."<br /> "Nothing, just forget it."<br /> Before she could say anything else the waitress returned setting their drinks in front of them she offered Laurel a warm smile.<br /> "Newlyweds?" She asked.<br /> "What?" Ivan asked, his head snapping up.<br /> "I asked if you were newlyweds, I'm pretty good at reading people and the way your beautiful bride keeps spinning her ring on her finger....must be a newlywed," She said with a smile.<br /> "Something like that," Laurel offered.<br /> "I thought so," The woman said happily.<br /> Laurel forced a smile back and Ivan turned to his menu, hoping the woman would take the hint, take their order and leave.<br /> "What can I get you?" She asked, pulling out a pad and pencil.<br /> "I'll have the grilled chicken special," Laurel said.<br /> "I'll have a steak and potatoes."<br /> The waitress hurried off, taking their menus with her and Laurel took a sip of her tea. Ivan waited until he was sure that the waitress was out of ear shot before he spoke.<br /> "Why did you tell her that?"<br /> "What?"<br /> "That we're newly weds?"<br /> "What did it hurt? We kind of are."<br /> "No, we're a far way from newlyweds," He replied.<br /> She shook her head and turned her attention to her now ringing phone, she answered it quickly and he took a deep breath. Something about the older woman's questions got under his skin, his and Laurels relationship wasn't something easy to explain and now it was even worse.<br /> "We'll be there as soon as we can mom." Laurel said.<br /> She hung up the phone and glanced at Ivan before setting it aside.<br /> "Mom's excited to see us," She said.<br /> "I'm sure she is."<br /> "I haven't been home since Christmas...it was too hard trying to make an excuse of wehre you were."<br /> "Why did you? Why not just tell them I was a prick and I ran out on you?"<br /> "I don't know, because.....it was too hard to tell them the truth about what happened and.....I didn't want to lie about you. You were a good husband."<br /> He fell silent, Laurel always made him sound like a saint but that was a lie. He tried to be good to her, he had loved her but he wasn't the best husband. He missed dinner, he came home late, he went away for days on rides, he forgot an anniversary or two but he had always loved her.<br /> "Okay, here we go."<br /> The waitress returned settling their plates in front of them with another happy smile, it was almost unnatural to be that happy in Ivan's opinion.<br /> "Thank you," Laurel smiled back at her, always the polite one.<br /> The waitress hurried away and Laurel picked up her fork and began to cut her chicken into pieces. Ivan watched her for a minute or two before digging into his steak.<br /> They exited the diner together a few hours later, Ivan heading to the driver side of the vehicle.<br /> "Do you want me to drive for a bit?" Laurel offered.<br /> "No, I want to get there in one piece."<br /> "My driving isn't that bad."<br /> "Uhhu, tell it to someone who hasn't rode in a car with you since you were seventeen."<br /> He climbed into the driver seat and she joined him on her own side, clicking her seatbelt in place.<br /> "I thought we'd drive a few more hours then find a motel, maybe order room service?"<br /> "That sounds like a great idea."<br /> She wanted to ask him what the sleeping arrangements would be, naturally she knew they wouldn't be sleeping together but she didn't know if they were getting two rooms or one. Deciding to play it by ear like she did everything else she didn't ask.<br /> They drove for a few more hours, knocking off as many miles as possible before Ivan found a small motel near the highway. He parked the car and Laurel followed him into the office.<br /> "I need two rooms, please." Ivan said, reaching for his wallet.<br /> "We only have one room available but it has two beds," The skinny boy behind the desk said.<br /> He glanced over his shoulder at Laurel and she gave him a small nod, two beds and one room was fine with her. He pulled his wallet from his back pocket and paid for their room. The kids slid the key across the counter and Ivan pocketed it before turning and Laurel followed him out the door.<br /> The walked across the parking lot to room number seven and Ivan opened the door, motioning for Laurel to go inside first.<br /> "Pick whichever bed you want."<br /> She moved to the bed furthest from the door, he slid the small gold chain in place locking them both in for the night. He hung his coat up on a nearby hanger.<br /> "Are you hungry?"<br /> "No."<br /> "I'm exhausted, can we just hit the sack?" He asked, toeing off his shoes.<br /> "Yeah sure."<br /> Laurel knew it was stupid to be nervous she and Ivan had slept together for years and now they would be in separate beds but still as she pulled off her shoes and jacket her nerves were on high alert. Her stomach turned and her hands felt shaky.<br /> Ivan climbed onto his bed, collapsing in his jeans and t-shirt and she glanced over at him realizing then they didn't bring their suitcases from the vehicle.<br /> "Do you want me to get the suitcases?" She offered.<br /> "No, just leave them. Get some sleep."<br /> She glanced down at her own jeans and t-shirt, she didn't want to sleep in them but also didn't want to take them off.<br /> "I'll turn off the light and we can both get more comfortable, I promise I won't look." He offered.<br /> "It's nothing you haven't seen before," She said with a shrug.<br /> He shrugged too then, sitting up he stripped off his jeans and pulled his shirt over his head tossing it aside. She looked away, her cheeks flushing. The last time she'd seen him shirtless was a few weeks ago when she'd stopped by his apartment unannounced. He'd been drunk at the time and that made the situation a little less awkward than it was now.<br /> He climbed under his blankets, rolling so his back was to her and she felt a little better that he wasn't looking. She timidly undid her jeans and let them drop at her feet, stepping out of them she then pulled her shirt over her head, she slipped off her bra before pulling her t-shirt back on and slipping under her own covers.<br /> "Thank you," She said gently.<br /> "Not a problem."<br /> Ivan kept his back to her as he reached over to switch off the bedside lamp, what Laurel didn't know and didn't need to know was that his back may have been facing her but the television was facing him. In the small screens dark reflection he had been afforded a view that until now he hadn't realized he had missed.<br /> The ear piercing scream woke Ivan from a deep and dreamless sleep, he bolted up right in the bed confused at first as to where he was. He wasn't in his shabby apartment he was in a shabby hotel along the highway and Laurel was in the other bed, screaming bloody murder.<br /> He tumbled from his own bed, the blankets wrapping around his legs for a minute and tripping him. He hit the dirty, stinky floor and pushed up scrambling towards the other bed.<br /> "Laurel, Laurel, Wake up."<br /> Switching on the light he caught her by her shoulders, her body thrashing beneath the sheets as he gave her a firm but gentle shake.<br /> "Laurel!"<br /> She sat up nearly knocking him over, gasping for air and covered in sweat. She glanced around, seeming confused and pushing a shaking hand through her blonde hair.<br /> "Are you okay?" He asked.<br /> "Yeah, I think so."<br /> "Nightmares?" He guessed.<br /> "Yeah."<br /> "I thought they had gotten better."<br /> "So did I," She said with a shake of her head.<br /> "When did they start again?" He asked.<br /> "I don't know sometime around getting shot and then they got worse after.......after Ezra."<br /> "Why didn't you tell me?" He asked, the hurt evident in his voice.<br /> "Why would I? There's nothing you can do, I'll get through it."<br /> She looked away, a stubborn set to her jaw but he saw the tears that were building in her pale blue eyes. Reaching out he cupped her chin with one hand, forcing her to look at him.<br /> "It's okay to still be scared, Laurel."<br /> She shoved him hard enough he nearly fell off the bed, then she scrambled from the bed herself moving across the room to the mini fridge she pulled out a tiny bottle of whiskey, unscrewing the lid and downing the contents.<br /> "What's there to be scared of? You killed them all."<br /> "Yeah I did but.....I can't undo what they did to you. You never talked about it, maybe you need too."<br /> "It was six years ago, I talked to plenty. To the cops, the therapist, I talked to lots of people just not you."<br /> "You could have."<br /> "No I couldn't because you weren't there, you checked out."<br /> For once he couldn't argue with her, he had checked out and he'd closed off. He'd been away for the day when Ezra called him, the strain in his cousins voice alerting him there was a problem before Ezra even told him the worst. He'd found Laurel, undressed, unconscious on the kitchen floor, she'd been beaten and violated. Somewhere during Ezra rattling off where she was taken by ambulance Ivan shut down.<br /> The frantic drive to the hospital, the interviews with the police, taking her home, cleaning up the mess that was made of the kitchen and caring for her all passed in a blur. Ivan could barely remember most of it looking back, like a bad dream that his mind wanted to ignore but Laurel didn't have that luxury, she remembered everything.<br /> At first she tried to talk to him, tried to explain why she recoiled every time he so much as glanced at her, at first he tried to listen but hearing her admit to the things they did to her was too much. Eventually it was easier to not listen anymore, not feel.<br /> He abandoned her in the time that Laurel needed him the most and she had recovered all alone.<br /> "Laurel....." He started to speak.<br /> "Let's just get some sleep, I'll be fine now."<br /> "Will it help if I leave the light on?" He asked.<br /> "No, I'm fine, really."<br /> She tossed the empty bottle into the trash and climbed across the bed, it was at this point he remembered her stripping for bed. She was wearing nothing but a t-shirt and black panties that did everything for her long legs.<br /> Before she pulled the blankets over her body he caught a glimpse of just one of the many scars left behind by that night. It ran from her hip down her thigh to nearly her knee and he knew there were plenty more, he hadn't seen her this undressed in years and had almost forgotten the scars that lay there physically as well as mentally.<br /> She leaned over and switched off the light, plunging the room into darkness. However brief and vague their conversation had been it was over. He stood and walked back to his own bed, climbing under the blankets.<br /> "For what it's worth.....I don't blame you," She said in the darkness.<br /> "I do."<br /> "Ivan...."<br /> "I should have been there, I should have known they would come after you, I should have....." He trailed off, not ready to go where his train of thought wanted to lead him.<br /> "They would have killed you."<br /> She knew they would have killed Ivan had he been home, she knew because it was that threat that they whispered in her ear to keep her from fighting back. Ivan had been the only reason she'd even somewhat cooperated.<br /> "Do you really think we can pull this off with your parents?" He asked, needing to change the subject.<br /> "Yeah, why not? We were in love once, it can't be that hard to fake it just a few days."<br /> "Any ideas on what you'll tell them after this week?"<br /> "I'm still thinking that through. I think maybe if mid way through this week we start to argue and not get along, if we have one good fight then I can tell them it's not working out anymore. They won't be as shocked."<br /> "You really think that's going to work?"<br /> "It's worth a try."<br /> "Laurel......if...if you want to talk..."<br /> "I don't it was a long time ago, I'm talked out."<br /> "Okay, I'll let you get some sleep then."<br /> He stood from her bed and she took that as a sign to slide down deeper into the blankets with a heavy sigh.<br /> As he climbed into his own bed and switched off the light he briefly wondered how long Laurel had been struggling with the nightmares. When they got their divorce they had been getting better, if he'd known she was struggling he might have tried to hold onto his sobriety a little more and tried to help her. The woman in that bed next to his had taken a magazine for him and he didn't even know she was struggling. |
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